humans are a creature of habit, or so what i would like to regard them as. when u boss people around the clock, you can't seem to shake it off, when you grow dependant on a certain person, you found it almost impossible at the prospect of living your life without the person. i am a creature that is complex by nature and even more hard to please. trust me,hehe. but the point here is, i hate people bossing me around, and i hate it even more when i had to think of not caring for someone as much as i did before. but under unexpected circumstances, i had to live my life without that person that i cared about once.

• the bossing part.

i know that all of us has different quirks, antics and personalities. but the quality that i loathe the most is when a person bosses other people around. hello,down to earth miss bossy. you don't own me,and that is a fact. some people has this preconceptions and pre-assumptions and when they act based on your own assumptions, it can lead to a very dangerous and misleading outcome. never ever assume and never perceive recklessly.

• the letting go part

once,i had this obsession on barbie dolls. i consider them my life,so you know how severe the outcome is when you have to grow up (forced to,actually,hehe) and shake the habit of binging your barbies everywhere along off. it was darn hard,and i'm not kidding you. but eventually, i gave in to the wish of my parents, that i no longer need to play with barbies and grow up and keep up with the rest of the world.hihi. it was hard, seeing my barbies placed on the upmost shelf,where my once used to be scrawny hands can't reach to. so i learned to deal with it. i had this curse,of being attached too easily;be it on people,animal,flowers,or even electrical appliances.(i can't help feeling sorry for the fan who had to operate the whole day for me). so,when it comes to humans it is harder to handle the emotions that comes with them. i love sincerely with the hope that people love me the same way.unconditionally. some proved true,some not so true,but heck,that is what life is all about isn't it?=))

i move on..=)

it's holiday now, n it's wet. huhu. rainy season's here, and it has so far claimed my laptop adapter and the heavy carpets. my life so far, has been slow paced, and a relaxed one. no datelines to moan and grieve about, no traffic and hassles, no communication whatsoever with the outside world of the human race. which is fine by me.hehehe. it's cold here you could almost imagine yourself in the artics.hehe.

aniwae,i'm writing today because i need to put my thoughts somewhere, or i'd go positively insane. i just got my pc back, and when i wanted to make the streamyx connection, i forgot i had to create the dialer first. then i called the tm net, but unfortunately there's something wrong with the phone. why? because i can hear the other end just fine when they can't hear me at all. now how frustrating can that be? arghhhhh....but thanx to en dzul azhar and his friend, i managed to create the dialer, though the connection is still problematic. so i had to result in the broadband, which thankfully, is working just fine.hehehe.

i'm gonna be babysitting tomorrow at my sister's house,hehehe. which gives me a chance to turn my nephews and niece into the unwilling participants of a military base camp,hakhak. i have to remind myself not to smile too much as they will bully me in turn,hehehe.altho i din get to work or adorn any uniform for work,i am currently holding the position of miss all rounder in the household (and other 2 households as well), so im pretty much tied up,but in a way, the feeling of reconnecting with your family is pretty much what i wanted after all the struggling with assignments and eherm,other matters.hehe.

and then i'll be going to mama's place, will help her to move out some stuffs to penang as well.hehehe,i'm gonna be busy.so,nothing much in progress,i'm just taking my own sweet time in life.lepaking,lepaking,folloed with more lepaking. but then, istill have some translation works to do..hehehehe.

home is where the heart is.=))

virgin to blogging

wat can i say..been wanting to dis for a lifetime, but suddenly i had dis weird itching and twitching in my head (and heart). so here goes nothing. i'm currently still a virgin to blogging, so please don't judge me on my first few attempts,hakhak!!!! well,must be pathetic to write on the first day of raya. but you know girls, when they feel like they gotta do it, they just gotta do it,hihihi.

raya is a joyous occasions, where you can meet once again with your dear friends and family, old and new, living or deceased;however you want it. to me, it's a weird recollection of your past and no matter how i mighty i gave the push , that bagful of skeletons are out of the closet. (again)

i gotta say,i'm forced to put myself in reality check over and over. today is d day you get to be on the spotlight and everyone else scrutinizing your every inch to every microscopic peck of your singular life. things or issues that arose:

1. im forced to remember (how sick dis is) my age,hukhuk. the repercussions of remembering my age is: self-loathing for STILL not working and providing my pamama.
2. annoyed for still studying and my brains for not working as happily as it once used to.
3. i need a break from questionnaires!!!!!!

tomorrow's gonna b a bigger day (can't wait to put myself on the stake). i love raya. dun get me wrong. it's just the bad aftertaste that gets me.

note:pamama=pak+mama+mak